Why is Self-Care So Darn Hard?
Okay, let’s just be honest about this. Self-care is Hard Work. Taking care of you takes planning, money, time, and brain-space – all things that most moms feel like they just don’t have enough of. Those are the same resources that you may feel are already stretched as you try to take care of everyone else.
And, you may feel like For Some Unknown Reason, you’re simply blocked from taking care of you. No matter how hard you try, it just doesn’t seem to stick. Everyone else just seems to be higher on your list, and you can feel yourself getting tired, resentful, and drained.
Sigh. So, what to do?
First, get past the guilt. We’ve all heard the obvious – that if you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be able to take care of others.
But let’s go deeper. Check in to see if you’re holding a belief that SOMEBODY ELSE is supposed to take care of you. (You may feel resentful because no one else is doing it the way you need.) Or you may be holding a belief that you don’t deserve to be taken care of. (You may feel that you’re unworthy of love and care.) Or, you may believe that mothers (or fathers) are supposed to show their love by draining themselves completely for their children. (Maybe that’s what your mother or father did.) If any of these sounds familiar, rings a bell, seems to hold some charge, or makes you reread the sentence, there’s a chance that you might be holding a belief that is blocking you from really nurturing yourself.
If you know that you’re holding one of these unhelpful common beliefs, or another one that you can identify, or if you are acting as if you are (usually means the belief is subconscious), first take time to really decide, consciously, if you really believe that.
If not, you’ve already taken the first step to releasing that belief – you’ve identified it. From now on, whenever you notice that you’re living from the unhelpful belief, instead of your consciously chosen belief, you can take a deep breath, repeat your consciously chosen belief in your mind, or out loud, and move forward. This very simple process can be incredibly powerful.
My next blog post will share a powerful key to self-care that I’ve never heard talked about before. Keep your eyes open!
Go HERE to find out more about Women’s Wellness Circles. I’d love to share in your journey of Experiences and Expressions of Motherhood.
Please share your experience with self-care below – we’d love to hear your insights!