The Key to Self-Care (That Nobody Talks About)
Okay, so here’s the thing. We KNOW that if we don’t know how, or aren’t any good at taking care of ourselves, we get drained and resentful, AND we can’t teach others what we need, and so, the situation spirals.
The people that love you – including your children – will miraculously get way better at supporting you when you start to figure out what you need, and act on it, showing others that you are worthy of this kind of care. And, even if they don’t, YOU will have made a breakthrough. You will feel different when you ACT AS IF you are worthy of the kind of care you need to thrive. In fact, you may even begin to thrive!
So, that’s important – deciding that YOU are going to take responsibility for your own self-care, not expecting others to do it first.
Here’s how it works…
One mom who was participating in a Wellness Circle once said she would never hesitate to jump out of bed to get her husband a glass of water, but wouldn’t do the same for herself. I love this example, because I find that when I’m thinking about taking care of me, it really helps me to imagine myself as two different people, Me that needs care (the one lying in bed, thirsty), and Me that is capable of providing care (the one getting up to get the glass of water).
I will tell you that it took me a loooooong time to figure out that when I clean my house, the Me that doesn’t like cleaning my house can do it as a gift for the Me that loves a clean house. I’m still working on this, but I will also tell you that the yummy, appreciated, and grateful feeling I have TOWARDS MYSELF when I see my house clean doubles the pleasure. Now the Me that is capable of providing care is valued and appreciated for my effort by the Me that needs care, AND I’m experiencing the pleasure of my clean house. So, both Me’s feel loved. Cool, right?
This also works in the bathtub or shower. Take a minute to get out of your head, and into your body. Actually experience your own touch as you massage your foot or scrub your arms. Feel yourself as the One Who Gives and the One Who Receives. Feel this physically – getting into the hand that is massaging your foot, and then into the foot that is receiving the massage.
Can you feel how beautiful and healthy this other kind of spiral is? It’s all full of yummy gratitude and love – things that you need, and deserve.
Gratitude and love are your birthright.
In my next blog post, I will share some tips for getting started on self-care while still keeping all those other balls in the air, so that all the needed planning and time and money and lack of brain-space stop getting in the way of you taking care of you.
If you haven’t read my last blog post on getting past the blocks that stop you from self-care, go here.
If you want to take a giant leap towards taking better care of yourself, check out our Women’s Wellness Circles. I’d love to share some peace and ease with you.
And please comment below! I’d love to hear how YOU take care of YOU!